Posts tagged hearing God
I am Loved

And when I realize this, that the greatest part of my being is that I am deeply and unconditionally loved, it makes me desperate to share the realness and the ability to feel this with those whose greatest feeling in their being right now is a lack of love.

Because this person that I am now, this loved and accepted and grace covered person, is not who I once was.

I spent many days and nights feeling
unloved.
unwanted.
not enough.
overwhelmed.
under qualified.
cast aside.
never good enough.

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Proverbs 31-ing

I know I personally struggle with fear rooted in a perfectionist mindset and with wanting to try everything out there instead of honing in on a few things I’m already passionate about and building margin into my life to *be* rather than just *do*… virtue may express itself through our actions but not all action is virtuous… if God Himself took time to rest and enjoy His creation, why do I tend to think I’m above that?

I simply cannot possibly be everything to everyone at all times — and I’m learning to be thankful for that rather than trying to ‘overcome’ it.

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A New Creation

And so I found myself faced with this question — do I really want to be a follower of Jesus?
When I really begin to understand what that looks like, when I dig into scripture while also expanding my world view beyond American Christianity, it’s astounding how much more there was to what I thought I knew, and how much heavier it weighed.

To be completely honest, for a moment in time, I really wasn’t sure.
I wrestled with the whys and the hows and the what ifs of it all. I struggled with feeling like I really didn’t understand what I was getting myself into when I declared myself a Christian however many years ago and I wasn’t sure I wanted everything that actually came with it.

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Once Upon a Time

Back then, I didn’t know Jesus.

I knew *of* Him…

I was real scared of hell and a big fan of Jesus.

But I hadn’t actually encountered Him yet.

I had no idea what it looked like to follow Him outside of the checkboxes of religion — and y’all, I really like checkboxes. As much as I can rebel against being told what to do, I love to know what to do and get to cross it off my list!

That’s the beginning of my story — for a twenty-something church girl, it seemed to take a lifetime to find my lifeline.

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Desiring God's Presence

Having moved 2000 miles from VA to TX, I dove into the study of Moses and I assumed the Lord would ask me to stop my complaining. I just survived a hot Houston summer, bugs the size of small rodents, and a record flood and hurricane season, but hey who is complaining? Of course the passages on the grumbling Israelites would put me in my place. Much to my surprise, the Lord had a bigger issue in my heart, which needed tending to.

Week after week, I was continually drawn to Moses himself as so many aspects of his life and his walk I admired and desired to strive towards. I spent many hours thinking about how desperately Moses desired the Lord’s presence above all and it was this very thing, his intimate face-to-face relationship with the Lord, which made the difference in his life. The Lord promised Moses victory over his enemies, promised him land flowing with milk and honey BUT Moses knew the better choice. Moses was willing to give up all those things and stay camped in the desert if the Lord refused to go on with them. Moses wanted the Lord’s presence!

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Why Your Child Needs a Counselor

In light of the most recent school shootings, I have come to the conclusion that our schools need less teachers and more counselors. As a teacher who is around children from ages 10-18 all day long, I can tell you without a doubt- your kid needs counseling. Even if he is not going through his parents’ painful divorce, a relationship break-up, struggle with pornography or a thought of suicide- he certainly knows someone else going through difficult times, and is trying to process it with them. Our kids need someone with clarity and insight to help them process through everything that is coming in and happening to them. Not only do our kids need it, they are desperate for it! School counseling offices across America are so booked that there is not enough time in the day to meet with all the kids that want help. Our kids are crying out for help. 

It is striking how desperate our culture is for counseling. Even as far back as 2004, one study from the American Psychological Association stated that over 50% of the people polled said that someone in their family has received or is receiving counseling, and 9/10 people said that they would go to or recommend a counselor to a loved one if a problem came up. A follow up article from 2014 shows that the trend has only been increasing year after year. 

 

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